Destructive Principles of Gossip

In-Depth study on the destructive aspects of gossip and how to neutralize them.

30 Destructive Principles of Gossip

1-People who gossip give themselves away. They tell how they truly feel about someone, but tell everyone BUT them.

2-People who gossip don't want to know the truth. If they did they would ask the one involved.

3-People who gossip believe lies, WANT to believe lies, and persuade others to believe lies.

4-Gossip is censorship and gross injustice. The one involved has no right to defend him/herself.
5-People who gossip deceive themselves. They deny it is gossip by calling it by something else to justify it.

6-Gossip is conspiracy. "A plot by two or more people against..."

7-Gossip doesn't want to know "The rest of the story."

8-Because of judgmental attitudes, the one who gossips will avoid and alienate the subject of the gossip, believing lies. Usually, how much they gossip is proportional to how much they avoid them.

9-The one hearing the lie, then finding out the truth later on - will continue to cling to the original story, and will wind up still avoiding the one involved, since it's too humiliating to admit they were wrong. Subsequently, the subject of the gossip is the one who suffers alienation.

10-If you are carnally minded, your thinking will "Dovetail" with the mentality of the gossip system and it's whole network of lies. You will twist convenient pieces of any argument to support preconceived thinking.

11-Gossip sows seeds of mistrust. The ones involved cause the subject of the gossip to lose faith in them.

12-There is no accountability and no responsibility with gossip. A tabloid mentality says anything about anyone for any reason, and answers to no one.

13-However, gossip is worse than tabloid newspapers! At least with them, you can go to the local newsstand to find out what they are saying about you!

14-Gossip polarizes people. The gossiper winds up resenting the subject of the gossip, true or not.

15-Carnally minded people who hear the gossip know that it is a lie because they don't inconvenience themselves to find out the truth.

16-If they do hear "The rest of the story" they "Play the devil's advocate" against the victim.

17-Gossip is a "loyal" one way street. Mrs. A is loyal to Mrs. B. If you tell A something about B, she will check with B to verify it. But if they talk about YOU (an outsider), they will NEVER tell you what they said to verify anything. To question it would be for them to betray each other.

18-Gossip goes into denial by sticking to the original story, and grasping for straws to avoid truth.

19-Gossip has the uncanny ability of drawing more and more conclusions on less and less info.

20-When gossip reaches "Critical Mass", you have a lynch mob mentality.

21-Gossip has a "Built-it seeking mechanism". It gravitates toward those who promote it, and avoid those who expose it.

22-Gossip has a built-in protection mechanism:
a-Pride stands in the way of admitting that they gossip - so never find out the truth from "The horse's mouth".
b-Pride stands in the way of finding out the truth for fear they may have been wrong.
c-The more time goes by, the more cemented they are in their belief that it is true. Hitler once said "If you tell a lie long enough, people will believe it."
d-Pride stands in the way of apologizing to the subject that they drew conclusions without knowing all the facts.
e-The more loyal they are in their relationship, the more protected the gossip is. Just like the "Solemn oath" all the elephants took when gossiping about "Mrs. Jumbo and Dumbo". If the gossipers have a strongly established loyal tie with each other, the gossip is like protecting a secret oath.

23-Why is it when one gossips to another about a third person, it alienates that person. If they tell C what A said, they alienate themselves from A, if they tell A what B said, it alienates them from B.

24-Gossip uses sincere people unwittingly, causing lies to be more convincing, since those who hear them think they are the truth, and only perpetuate the scenario.

25-Gossip has the uncanny ability of benefiting the gossipers in areas of approbation, flattery, "mutual enemy society", all at the victim's expense.

26-After so much time goes by, people only have a general opinion of you (bad) w/o remembering the details and lies. Consequently, attempts to set the record straight is futile. (ie. The 10 O'clock news)

27-By taking part in gossip, in the final analysis you are an "Accessory to the crime".

28-Because of this, there is a "blackmail" protection built into it because each party can preventing them from "blowing the whistle" on each other.

29-The door is now wide open for gossip to have free reign. Once one gossip session is permitted, a precedent is now set for others - even sessions about YOU!

30-Beware! How much someone talks to you about others may be how much they talk to others about you!